A Sake Party, What Else?
by invasianofasians
Summary: Matsumoto's holding a sake party...and a certain taicho is not amused. But what happens when he stumbles on his childhood friend...confessing? Humor-filled and slight HitsuHina fluff. Please R&R! Rated for someone's potty mouth...
1. The Party

**A weird one-shot that I thought up of after reading too many fanfics. Enjoy! As always, reviews are to be taken as cookies and I will gobble them up for you so please give me some!**

**Apply_Standard_Disclaimer_Here (or buy online at .com)**

Hitsugaya was in a bad mood. An extremely bad one, to be exact. It was mostly because of a certain drunk fukutaicho, but the stress of the paperwork and frequent captains' meetings were adding up. Our poor friend was suffering from a common case of overworking.

And on a particularly bad evening, when Hitsugaya had just finished dealing with a dozen imperfect Arrancar in the outskirts of Rukongai, he walked back to his division, hoping for a small hot cup of green tea to soothe his nerves, and a nice long sleep.

What he found instead was a locked door, loud music, and flashing lights at the division.

"MATSUMOTO! OPEN UP DAMMIT!" The door cracked the slightest fraction of an inch, and a red-faced Matsumoto peered out, grinning as she saw the latest newcomer to her impromptu drinking party.

"Ahhhh Taaaiiccchhooo you're herrreeee!" She slurred as the door opened and Hitsugaya rushed in, face grim. He went in so fast that he almost missed the tiny device that Matsumoto shoved in his hand.

"Ano, taicho! Help me take some pictures with this ca-ca-cam-m-me-r-ra thing!" Hitsugaya stared down at the white device with a big silver button.

"Just press on the button to take a picture!"

"And what if I don't, Matsumoto?"

"Then I'll spread rumors about you and-"

"That doesn't work on me, you know." Hitsugaya let out a small sigh of relief as Matsumoto moved on.

"Or I'll make you wear an angel costume around the whole Sereitei for a MONTH." Damn, was she perceptive about her taicho even when she was dead drunk.

Hitsugaya bristled. "Fine, fine I will." He slowly inched his way into the heart of the party. It was apparent that Matsumoto had effectively made everyone there into a drunkard.

As he was walking past the makeshift bar, chock-full of jugs and bottles of expensive sake, Hitsugaya caught sight of a slightly interesting scene. Nanao-fukutaicho, and Shunshui-taicho, who was always flirting with her, were madly making out in the corner. Turning away so that his virgin eyes would not be scarred forever, Hitsugaya aimed and fired. A bright pop of light flashed for a split second, before dimming.

_What the hell did Matsumoto do to these people?_ Hitsugaya stood in the corner, agitated about all the sake cups and bowls on the floor, just itching for something to knock them over. His eyes peeled over the room, slowly roasting as their innocence was stripped away.

In that corner, Renji was dancing around, singing "I'M A RED PINEAPPLE, TALL AND WEIRD. HERE IS MY ZANPAKUTOU, HERE IS MY HEAD. LA LA LA LA LA LA LAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" complete with the body gestures. Grimacing, Hitsugaya took a few quick pictures, while planning in his head to invite Renji to sing at Matsumoto's upcoming funeral.

In the opposite corner, he caught Kira passed out, Yachiru happily drawing on his face with permanent marker, courtesy of Ichigo. Yachiru had drawn a very...interesting mustache, and had written the words "FAG" and "DOUCHEBAG" in giant letters all over his face. A few pictures later, and Hitsugaya had moved on.

Behind an elaborately painted screen of Hyourinmaru at its finest, Hitsugaya found Ichigo and Rukia madly locked in a tight lip-lock, a flustered Hanatarou keeping the time besides them. "12:00...12:01...12:02..." Hitsugaya didn't bother staying to see how long they could last; he high-tailed out of there after one measly picture.

It seemed that each scene was more disturbing than the last. For example, seeing Nemu-fukutaicho sitting in the lap of Madarame...while both of them giggled uncontrollably at the 1200'' flat-screen TV that Rukia had made Ichigo bring. _Where the hell did he find that thing? My office isn't that big you know..._

A sudden shot of bright blue light made Hitsugaya stumble and hit the wall. He inwardly cussed at the blithering idiot, and turned around to see what had caused it.

An extremely dangerous sight awaited him. Hitsugaya saw the three ryoka that had come with Ichigo doing something entirely deranged and out of their mental capacity. Orihime, grinning, pulled Chad to the wall, while Ishida backed up all the way to the _opposite_ wall. Watching through wide eyes, Hitsugaya saw Orihime place an apple delicately in Chad's curly hair, then signaling to Ishida. It seemed like a horror stunt as the drunk Quincy pulled out his bow and a familiar bright light appeared in his hand. Like something out of a horror fairytale, Hitsugaya felt himself paralyzed as the Quincy lifted the bow, and (interjection from Hitsugaya: NOT IN MY OFFICE YOU!) fired. In slow motion. And completely missing Chad altogether, but managing to blow a hole 20 feet wide in the side of the tenth division barracks. Of course, it was picture-worthy, and Hitsugaya moaned as he took them.

The runaway arrow had almost managed to hit a mumbling Yumichika, who was busy making out with a mirror. Hitsugaya skipped over that part altogether, though he knew he had to take at least one idiotic picture for an equally idiotic fukutaicho.

As he slunk around from corner to corner, Hitsugaya also noticed Yamamoto-soutaicho, surrounded by several female Shinigami a couple hundred years his junior. Jaw slackening in disbelief, Hitsugaya saw a few adventurous ones stroke his beard, the source of Yamamoto's pride.

_Could this day be any worse? Could it? I don't think so._ Turning his head around and around, Hitsugaya saw many, many, **many** more sights awaiting him. He slowly made his way around the room, taking picture after picture of couples making out, couples kissing, a deconstructive conga line led by Hisagi-fukutaicho...Isane-fukutaicho, Ukitake-taicho, and Iba-fukutaicho playing strip poker...wait. What?

The three said Shinigami were in an intensive battle of luck, will, and of course, sake. Ukutake was doing pretty well, having only been forced to take off his haori, and Iba was keeping up with only his socks and sandals gone, but poor Isane was down to her...erm, how shall we put this? Undergarments...

And then to the stage that had been set up in the middle of the room. The things awaiting Hitsugaya there made him want to scream, cry, and run into his room and kill himself.

Allow me to elaborate for our poor taicho here. The scenes were horrifying, all right.

First there was Unohana-taicho. The normally sane and charismatic taicho had been found doing an extremely sultry, intense, and sweating-your-ass-off tango with -who else?- Kenpachi-taicho. The bells on the tips of Kenpachi's hair jingled merrily as he dipped Unohana in such a suggestive manner that Hitsugaya almost passed out from his overreacting brain.

Then, there was Soi Fon-taicho, doing something that seemed so out of her league, even Hitsugaya was surprised. Hitsugaya didn't even want to know how Matsumoto had found such a tall pole, but she had done it. As you could've guessed, some tipsy taicho was pole dancing, to the "oohs" and "aahs" and wolf-whistles of half of the male Sereitei population. She was, to be honest with you, "really working it," to the point where our little taicho had ditched the camera altogether and was wandering around the room, trying to clear his mind. Unbeknownst to him, a small hand grabbed the camera and started taking pictures.

But, fate was cruel, and the next time Hitsugaya had lifted his head, he was greeted with a sight that would be forever branded in what was left of his brain.

Byakuya-taicho. Dancing to the song "I'm Sexy and I Know It."

His captain's haori thrown to the side, Byakuya had opted for the bare-chest look. As always, three-quarters of the female Sereitei population were screaming as he danced and flew around the stage, gyrating to the strong beats emitting from the boom box in the corner. Then, to the surprise of everyone there, Soi Fon and Byakuya went back to back, shimmying up and down to the rhythm of the music. Halfway through (Hitsugaya had almost passed out by then), Soi Fon grinned and pecked Byakuya on the cheek. An uproar was heard from everyone, including the Soi Fon Fanboys and Byakuya Fangirls.

No one noticed Matsumoto as she subtly switched the song on the boom box. It was now playing "Whip My Hair."

Almost instantaneously, the four taichos on stage literally "whipped out their hair." Byakuya's kenseikan were carelessly flung to the ground, Soi Fon's white ribbons were scattered on a chair, Unohana's hair band was thrown to the side as Kenpachi grabbed his hair and tore out the bells. Then they proceeded to do one of the most bizarre renditions of the song ever seen. Let's just say that Unohana had a hell of a lotta hair, Soi Fon had the longest hair anyone could've imagined, Byakuya looked like he reverted back quite a few years, and Kenpachi looked a whole lot scarier than normal.

Of course, the crowd was enjoying it. And even more so when Yoruichi shunpoed on stage and whipped her hair with them. Urahara just stood at the side, laughing behind his white fan.

Poor Hitsugaya. As he made his way to his salvation (the door) he was stopped by none other then...

"HITSUGAYA-KUN!" Crap, his old friend. Hinamori smiled as she pulled Hitsugaya into a hug, before laughing and spinning in dizzy circles. Concerned, Hitsugaya pulled her into the nearest chair and asked, "How much did Matsumoto give to you?"

"Oh, Rangiku-chan? Not that much...about a small cup, I think." Hinamori's cheeks were flushed pink as she closed her eyes.

"Are you sure?"

"Yep! Hey, do you even know why we're having this party, anyway?"

"Nope. Haven't got a clue. Could you fill me in on it?"

"Shiro-chan...you don't remember?"  
"Remember what?"

"Shiro-chan...we defeated Aizen." And Hinamori laughed.

_Wasn't she the one that would almost always cry because of him? What changed her that quickly?_ Hitsugaya decided to ask a stupid question.

"Who's Aizen, Hinamori?"

"Don't tell me you forgot!" Hinamori hmmphed. Hitsugaya prepared for her to launch into a three hour spiel about her former captain.

"Humor me please."

"Aizen's a giant weasel! He was in the outskirts of Rukongai and you and Ichigo killed him!"

"What the heck?"

"It's true!" Hinamori stifled another giggle, before peering into Hitsugaya's eyes. "Are you okay, Shiro-chan?"

Hitsugaya gritted his teeth. _So even a small cup can make her this drunk, huh..._ Tiredly he mumbled, "I'm going back to my room to rest up. See you later, bed-wetter."

"Don't be so mean to me, Shiro-chan! Do you know how much I love you?" _Woah woah woah what did she just say?_ Hitsugaya felt his cheeks flame up, before he ran out of the room. _She's just drunk, she's just drunk. Nothing else to it. _

Hitsugaya ran out without telling her anything, as he headed straight for his sanctuary. But when he got to his comforting, familiar room, he noticed that it oozed of sake, perfume, and sex. Glumly, he left his room, seeking shelter in the old house that he lived in as a kid. _With her...only with her..._

**This will probably be a two-shot when I get the chance to do it! Please give me stuff, like ...**


	2. The Aftermath

**The sequel. I decided to make one o.o Hope it's not too bad...please give me reviews and I will give you cookies! How about three cookies for every review? I think that's good enough!**

A small figure darted through the darkened room. Most of the Shinigami had either

A) Went back to their barracks

B) Passed out in the middle of the room

C) Passed out in the hallway, or

D) Passed out in the middle of Sereitei.

However, this one was severely underaged, and had spent most of the party using a camera she had found lying on the ground, discarded by a highly disturbed taicho. Now she made her way to a snoring strawberry-blond fukutaicho.

"Hello? Anyone home?" She casually flicked her finger again and again at the sleeping figure, and, as expected, elicited no response.

The Shinigami sighed. She scratched, she tore, she almost started to bite the person, and nothing seemed to work until...

"I know you can hear me. You keep saying that Gin-taicho is sexy and that you want him." With that, Matsumoto sat upright, blinking the sleep out of her eyes. She frowned disapprovingly at the tiny figure sitting in front of her.

"What do you want? I need to sleep, so tell me what you want, and then let me sleep." Matsumoto groaned. The mystery person in front of her grinned, and pulled out that accursed device from the real world. Matsumoto's eyes lit up, and she smiled a Chesire smile.

"I want you to put these in the Sereitei Communication as a special magazine extra," was all the person said, knowing that since Matsumoto was a vital part of that paper (yes, she does work sometimes. Don't look at me with those eyes now), she would have all the things she needed to spread rumors, or use it as excellent blackmail material. Matsumoto's brain was booting up.

"Would you like me to do anything else for you?"

"Yes please. Please...write that I was the one to take the pictures."  
"But I told taicho to!"  
"And Shorty is gone. And I have the camera. Take your pick, Boobs."

Matsumoto thought for a while, and then relented. "Fine, have it your way."

THE DAY AFTER THE PARTY

~First Division~

"Ahh..." Yamamoto-soutaicho sighed as he rattled the bottle of pills. Almost empty. He would have to get some more from Unohana-taicho ASAP. Slowly turning the bottle over and over in his trembling fingers, he slowly popped three pink pills into his mouth and quickly swigged it down with a bit of tea. Yes, even the the most-feared soutaicho of Soul Society would swig his tea. It's a known fact.

"Where's the paper, Sasakibe? You do know that I read it every day," his gravelly voice echoed in the chamber. What he wasn't expecting was to see his lieutenant, his face as white as his hair, stumble into the room, holding the paper.

"What's wrong, Sasakibe? Did someone write something bad?"

"Even worse, Yamamoto-soutaicho."

"Hn...did one of the barracks catch fire?"

"Even worse, Yamamoto-soutaicho."

"Did Mayuri-taicho explode a few more Shinigami?"

"Much, much worse, Yamamoto-soutaicho."

"Hm...are there no more bananas left to eat?"

"Yes, Yamamoto-soutaicho." With those words, Sasakibe watched in mild interest as the oldest and most mature taicho of them all threw a temper tantrum.

"Yamamoto-soutaicho, I was just joking around. There are still bananas left."  
"So the news can't be THAT bad, right?"  
"No. It's extremely bad news. I think you should see for yourself." Shaking, Sasakibe handed the paper to Yamamoto. Yamamoto saw the picture on the front before he even saw the paper itself. His eyes opened wide, as he flipped through the purple magazine, sometimes laughing, sometimes almost screaming to the point where Sasakibe thought he was going to have a heart attack (at his age, of course it was extremely possible for that to happen). Then, he turned to the last page, blanched, and his eyes widened. Like, actually widened.

"Sasakibe? We have work to do. Let's go visit one of the divisions, shall we?"  
"Yes, Yamamoto-soutaicho."

~Second Division~

Soi Fon woke up with a terrible headache. God, how much _did_ she drink last night? She made a mental note to herself to lace the tenth division's SSS (secret sake stash) with something.

Pissed, she stumbled her way to the barracks, only to smell a queasy, disgusting odor emitting from the courtyard. Without any hesitation, Soi Fon flung the double doors open.

To find all of her subordinates burning something on a gigantic fire. A gigantic, foul-smelling fire.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU PEOPLE DOING?" Her voice boomed in the now silent courtyard. Many shrank in fear; no one wanted her to end up using her shikai here.

"Um...queen lady madam mistress commander-" A brave voice said shakingly.

"Enough with the honorifics! Get to the point, NOW."

"Um...we're burning today's Sereitei newspaper, Soi Fon-taicho."  
"And do I have the right to know why?" Oh, crap. Her arms were crossed. That was definitely _not_ a good thing. The poor Shinigami that had started talking had also started shrinking away. He had no idea how to tell her about the paper.

"Um...I don't think it's a good idea for you to know." He stuttered.

"And why not?"  
"..."

"He fainted! Get some help!" The Shinigami, thankful for the disturbance, hurriedly attended to him, but were stopped by a harsh command.

"One Shinigami does not need another hundred something of them to attend to him. Now man up and tell me, or I will use Suzemebachi on you, starting with," her sharp eyes darted around and finally settled on who seemed to be the leader (a fat, ugly pedophile), "you."

"WHY ME?" The pedophile nearly screamed, but contained himself. "Um, er, eh, uh, huh, heh, oh..."

"I think it would be better for you to just look at these," a smooth female voice advised as Yoruichi and Urahara appeared next to her. Soi Fon looked dubious as Yoruichi handed her a purple magazine.

"Just read it. You'll know why." Urahara laughed as he and Yoruichi disappeared into thin air.

"NOOOOO THAT LADY JUST SIGNED OUR DEATH SENTENCE! DON'T READ IT, SOI FON-SAMA! PLEASE DON'T!" The Shinigami went on their knees and begged her.

But it was too late. A delicate eyebrow twitched, and then came the words.

"_Sting all enemies to death, Suzemebachi._"

~Third Division~

"Ah, Kira-fukutaicho. Are you sick today? Feeling okay?" A worried female Shinigami noticed that her fukutaicho was, oddly enough, wearing a medical mask of some sort.

A muffled noise came from inside the mask. "Mmmh mph mmmm mph mmmmmmmhhhhhhhwwwmm."

"Pardon?"

"He said, 'Yes, I am fine. Please do not worry about me.'" Oh, the joy of having your Zanpakutou materialize behind you and help you out. Wabisuke: the eternally mournful. He looked like some emo dude, but would gladly take your life by bashing the giant ball of his in your face.

"Oh? Really? Do you want me to take him back to the 4th Division? I don't think he's okay."

Wabisuke, for once, actually grinned. "He doesn't want to. He doesn't want to see Isane-"

"Mhhhhh mwwww mph mph hmmmmm mhmmmmphmm mmmmmmwwwwwph!"

"Oooh, someone has the hots for that fukutaicho eh?" A smile spread on her lips.

"MMMMMMMHPPPHH MWWWWW MPPHHHHMPHM MWWWMM!"

"I think we made him mad," Wabisuke commented as Kira, from the lack of oxygen in the tight mask, fainted. "Care to see the real reason why his face is covered up?"

"Of course!"

"Just read the magazine extra in the Sereitei Communications. It's purple; you can't miss it. Here, I have a copy." Wabisuke handed the purple magazine to the smirking Shinigami.

"I'd be glad to. Please, give my regards to the fukutaicho when he wakes up."  
"That is, if he ever wakes up."

~Fourth Division~

Waking up to a hangover wasn't exactly the best thing in the world. Especially when you were attending to several hundred people that _also_ had hangovers.

Unohana-taicho pressed a delicate hand to her forehead as she dispensed the pink pills at each bed. _Sooner or later I'll have to have Isane get out the placebos. We can't afford to give out too many of these. I haven't even had Kurotsuchi-taicho make some more. Oh, I wish that this was all over. I need some pills for myself, too._ Unohana was so caught up in her little mind-rant that she didn't notice Isane until the last minute.

"Oof! I'm so sorry, Unohana-taicho!" Isane scrambled to pick up the spilled pills all over the floor. In the process, the purple magazine under her arm fell to the floor, resting on a certain page. Uh oh.

Usually, no one was able to see Unohana's bursts of anger and live to tell the tale, but Isane was an entirely different matter. Since Unohana had a soft spot for her, she let her live.

Unohana's eyes narrowed, her smile twisting into a slight frown. Isane began to tremble in fear of the accursed photo.

"I-i-i-i am so-o-o-o so-o-orr-r-r-y ta-i-i-ch-ch-o," she managed to choke out. Smiling, Unohana reached a hand out and helped Isane up.

"Isane?"

"Yes, Unohana-taicho?"

"May I take this...magazine with me for a bit?"

Isane shuddered, picturing what Unohana would do when she saw the strip poker pictures.

"Of course, Unohana-taicho."

"Good." Evil Unohana was out. She was thinking about all the ways that she could tamper with the tenth division's fukutaicho's medicine stash. Perhaps slip a bit of estrogen or testosterone during her next check-up? That would be a sight to see.

~Fifth Division~

Pain. Terrible, deep pain. Hinamori sat up, her head buzzing slightly. _Mou, Rangiku-san knows that I can't handle my liquor...my head hurts._

But the pain was nothing compared to what she had just heard.

A thought out confession. All on tape. To Shiro-chan, of all people.

Hinamori wanted to die.

What had happened just a few minutes ago had shocked Hinamori out of her senses. She had just woken up, only to see a slim disk of some sort on the pillow next to her. A card was carefully placed underneath with the words

_Press Play._

Hinamori had found the "play" button, and was embarrassed, horrified, and saddened by what she had just heard. Her eyes brimming with tears, she thought, _how could I say that to him?_

_"Baka Momo-san. You know your own feelings. Don't deny it now._" A voice echoed in her mind.

"Tobiume?"

"_Who else would it be?_"

"Uh..."

"_Momo-san, I would advise you to go find him right now. I can't sense Hyourinmaru at all; that's not a good thing, either._" With that, Tobiume vanished from Hinamori's mind.

~Sixth Division~

"!" Laughter was heard around the normally calm and quiet Sixth Division. Byakuya's eyelids twitched. He wasn't used to such loud noises at all.

"Renji. Do you have any idea what they are laughing at?" Renji shook his head.

"No, taicho. No idea at all. Would you like me to go over and check?"

"Of course, Renji." Byakuya disappeared into his office.

Renji slowly made his way towards the horde of Shinigami huddled over the PMOMD (Purple Magazine of Mass Destruction). He frowned, before casually slipping a hand through the crowd, throwing the PMOMD in the air, and catching it.

"Sorry, guys, but taicho wants to see it. And you know, orders are orders." Renji ignored the horrified looks of the onlookers, before sauntering back to Byakuya's office.

"Yo, taicho? I got-" He stopped, and stared at a completely pale Byakuya, staring into the screen of -what was it again?- oh, yes, a laptop.

"Taicho?"

"Do not disturb me. I am merely plotting how to massacre the whole SWA (Shinigami Women's Association)."

"Why?" Byakuya shoved the screen at Renji.

It was the homepage of , and right in the front, two shocking videos. From the SWA.

RED PINEAPPLE FINALLY ADMITS THAT HE IS ONE (Renji) - 2,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 views, and counting.

THE HOTTEST TAICHO JUST GOT SEXIER (Byakuya) - 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 views. AND counting.

"I get it now," Renji said casually as he smashed the laptop into bits. "Forgive me, taicho."

"I'll just get that idiot Kurosaki to get me another one. Care to plan out the attack with me?"

"Sure, taicho. Whatever you want."

"So where should we put the grenades first?"

~Seventh Division~

Komamura, being a fox, declined the offer for the party. He wasn't sure what alcohol would do to his body, and he didn't want to find out. He was sure that Mayuri would want to experiment on him later.

Currently, he was laughing his fur off at the PMOMD. I mean, all those crazy pictures did have some usefulness.

"Iba! You look hilarious in this one!" Komamura's laugh startled Iba completely.

"Um...thanks, taicho?"

~Eighth Division~

Nanao felt queasy as soon as she saw the PMOMD. She knew that Shunsui-taicho had practically dragged her to the party, but she wasn't sure what had happened next.

A few wolf-whistles startled her out of her musings. A few Shinigami grinned back.

"You got yourself a real man right there." _What in the name of God was he talking about?_

"Careful; I heard he's a playboy sometimes." _Who's "he?"_  
"I gotta say, I was surprised. But, I won the bet!" _What bet? What are they talking about?_

"Nanao-chan!" She heard a familiar voice, and saw the Shinigami in front of her disappear like smoke. Clipping her glasses, Nanao frowned.

"Care to tell me what happened last night, Shunsui-taicho?"

"Oh, Nanao-chan! You really want to know?"

"Of course, taicho." Shunsui thought for a bit, before pointing to the PMOMD.

"That has all your answers, Nanao." Nanao blinked. Did he just call her Nanao just now? Not Nanao-chan, but plain Nanao? What was happening?

She never got the chance to ask before he swept away in a sea of cherry blossoms.

Nanao skimmed through the pages, her blush deepening with every passing second, until she looked like a red balloon. Hands trembling, she put the magazine down.

"SHUNSUI! WHERE ARE YOU?"

~Ninth Division~

Hisagi banged his head against the wall so hard that it started bleeding.

Dear God, he had made a fool of himself.

I mean, seriously? Leading a decrepit conga line? While drunk? Poor Hisagi needed to make better -and wiser- decisions.

Seriously, he could hold his liquor. Albeit not as well as the Queen of Drunkards herself, but he was decent.

So why was banging his head against the wall at seven in the morning over the PMOMD?

Because that same queen had snuck into his editing room and created that disgusting tabloid.

Hisagi was the editor-in-chief of Sereitei Communications, and he made it his goal to provide the whole of Soul Society with fast, affordable, interesting news.

Not gossip. No one really wanted to pay for gossip.

~Tenth Division~

"There." Matsumoto huffed as she added the last bindings of the kido trap to her precious SSS. She knew what she had done yesterday.

And she also knew that someone had spiked the sake.

First, she had woken up with a nasty hangover. That had never happened to her before. What the heck was going on?

Matsumoto prided herself on never choosing a sake with too high of an alcohol content. This would just promote bad hangovers, and nasty stuff. The highest any sake could get was a 0.8%. She even had the tools to test each and every one to make sure that it was suitable.

And when Matsumoto had tested the sake at four in the morning, she was in for a surprise.

Each of the containers of sake had over 25% of an alcohol content. The highest she had ever seen.

_No wonder Momo-chan got drunk after one cup. It's simply not possible. Someone DID spike the sake, and now I'm paying for it_.

The best thing that Matsumoto coud do was to get more sake bottles, dilute the mess, and hide it back in her secret hiding place.

_I swear...Kurotsuchi-taicho will get it once I get out of here. I just know that he did that_.

So where was out beloved short, white-haired taicho?

Well, you're just going to have to suck it up and wait for a bit.

~Eleventh Division~

The whole of the eleventh division was shaking to its core. Some taicho was extremely pissed at someone else.

Someone that he couldn't bear to hurt.

Nope, not his lover. Nope, not a prostitute. Yep, his pink-haired fuku-taicho

"Aww come on, Ken-chan! You gotta admit you got some good pictures with Unohana-taicho!"

"Yachiru...I don't understand why you could do this to all of us," Kenpachi-taicho shook his head as he held the offending article with his fingertips.

"GAH! NOW KUROTSUCHI-TAICHO WILL KILL ME!" Madarame's screams were heard from halfway across the whole Sereitei. "I MUST GO TRAIN! YUMICHIKA, COME WITH ME! STOP MAKING OUT WITH THE MIRROR LIKE YESTERDAY!"  
"I wouldn't do that kind of thing!" Yumichika dashed after his bald friend, running to the eleventh division's training grounds.

"Ken-chan..." Yachiru bowed her head. Apparently it wasn't a good idea to put that she was the one to take the pictures.

Kenpachi rubbed her hair affectionately. "Don't sweat it, Yachiru. I mean, you just ruined my friendship with Unohana, but I think I could patch it up if I tried."

Then, his reiatsu flared up. "But someone's gonna pay for this." Kenpachi might've been a big, buff bully but he wasn't as stupid as other people thought he was.

He knew that it couldn't have been Matsumoto's problem. Well, the party was, but the sake? Something just didn't seem right.

After he had gone back to his office, he had thought about it. He'd been to Matsumoto's parties before, and the sake didn't affect him as much as yesterday's party. And Matsumoto probably didn't even have a reason for why she would suddenly have high alcohol content sake.

Someone had spiked the sake. Kenpachi was sure of it.

_And who else would have the tools, the materials to do it? Of course, there was only one person that would. _

"Yachiru?"

"Hm, Ken-chan?"

"I have an errand to run to the twelfth division. Care to join me?"

~Twelfth Division~

"Mayuri-sama." Nemu said as bluntly as possible. She wasn't about to forgive her father figure just yet.

After all, he had spiked the sake with something with such a high alcohol content that Nemu couldn't take it herself. She knew, just in her mind, that only Mayuri-sama would do this to her.

"Hnn, Nemu? What do you need from me?"

"I need..." Nemu paused, before fiddling with the syringe hidden in her hands behind her back. Waking up with her terrible headache, Nemu and stumbled to the lab for a cure.

And had found the syringe, with some pale green liquid in it. The words on the paper underneath were too jumbled for a normal Shinigami to decipher, but Nemu had grown used to her taicho's writing.

She was mad. Actually, more like pissed. And now she was going to have her taicho pay.

"Speak up," Mayuri said harshly. "I don't have all day for this, Nemu. The experiments are calling."  
And that was right then when Nemu had become a blur in the air, and before Mayuri knew it, the syringe was jabbed in his arm, and Nemu's angry face came into view.

"Nemu, what do you think you're doing?" Mayuri asked as he saw a fragile finger placed on the end of the syringe.

"Getting revenge, Mayuri-sama." And with that, Nemu pushed the end, sending pure alcohol into his system.

"Sweet dreams."

~Thirteen Division~

Ukitake-taicho was rushed to the fourth division after suffering somewhat of a mini heart attack from all the sake. Unohana had thrown a fit, after seeing the results on screen.

_Sake overdose. Unknown substance._

Substance? What was that supposed to mean? Ukitake mused over that thought as he rested in the fourth division, muttering to himself.

Apparently word spread quickly around Sereitei. Within hours, his whole room was filled with candy, flowers, sweets, gifts, etc. Even someone had put in a Mac from the real world.

His personal candy eater, Yachiru, was making quick work of the food.

"Yachiru, where's Kenpachi-taicho?" The pink-haird girl looked up from her sixtieth lollipop and smiled.

"He was going to do something at the twelfth division, I think." Ukitake's eyes widened.

_I know what happened now._

"EMERGENCY! WHERE'S UNOHANA-TAICHO?" Hanatarou's eyes were glazed as he ran across the room.

"7th seat Yamada, what happened?"

"12th Division Kurotsuchi-taicho has just been brought in!"

Ukitake, Unohana, and Yachiru's eyes were wide open. "What?"

"He fainted on the floor! He has an alcohol content of 60%!" Unohana got up from her chair.

"Sorry, Ukitake. I'll come back later. Right now we need to help him," and with that, she left the room.

~Meanwhile~

"Shiro-chan? Where are you?" A girl was searching for her friend around Sereitei.

Little did she know that he wasn't there in the first place. He was somewhere else.

Elsewhere, a white-haired taicho opened his eyes and shivered.

**Cliffy! I think I will have to make this into a three-shot instead of the original two-shot! Many thanks to everyone who reads it! Even the people that don't review!**


	3. The Confessionor is it?

**Okay. I'm really excited to finish my first multiple-shot fanfic! Yes! **

**Just to let you know, this is my first try at anything remotely fluffy for any couple, so bear with me and review to tell me how good it is...if it's good at all.**

**There will also not be as much humor as planned. Sorry about that**

**So please, R&R! **

**Hinamori**

"Shiro-chan? Where are you?" Hinamori was having a pretty disastrous day.

First, she had woken up with a full tape of her apparent confession to Hitsugaya.

And now, he was nowhere to be found.

Hinamori had searched _everywhere_. His office was neat and tidy, no evidence that he had gone in at all. His room was messy, however, and Hinamori had caught two Shinigami sleeping together in there. Slowly backing out, Hinamori had ran across the whole of Sereitei, searching for him.

**Hitsugaya**

From a small, tiny hut in Rukongai, Hitsugaya stirred and shivered in the cold. Even he, the taicho that could withstand the cold the best, was cold.

_I remember what happened now. THAT happened...Hinamori..._ the freezing cold enveloped him in its icy arms and he fell asleep again.

**Hinamori**

"Mou, I don't know where Shiro-chan is at all," Hinamori thought with a frown. Her emotions swirled around inside her. Friendship. Worry. Sadness. And a hint of love. She had never considered herself to be one of this fangirls that fawned over Hitsugaya; she preferred to stand to the side, silently watching him. He had been her Shiro-chan, and it was heart-breaking to see him grow up so fast in front of her.

"I've checked everywhere inside Sereitei _four_ times now! Where else could he be?" Hinamori silently fumed as she furrowed her eyebrows, thinking about each and every place she had gone to. Little did she know that a certain Zanpakutou decided to make an appearance just to help her master.

"Tobiume, what are you doing here?" Hinamori asked in surprise as the tiny spirit settled onto the floor, her bells creating a soothing melody that was scattered in the wind.

"What does it look like, Momo-san?" Her spirit smirked. "I'm here to tell you where he is."

"You know where he is, Tobiume?"

Tobiume shrugged. "Not exactly, but I think I do know where he is."

"Where is he?" Hinamori could hear her voice growing anxious by the second.

"Do you really think that I would just tell you, Momo-san?" The spirit laughed, before calming down and staring at Hinamori with equally intense eyes. "What I can tell you is this: _remember to follow your heart. Follow your heart, and you'll find him_."

"What's that supposed to mean?"  
"I'll leave that to you to find out." With one last smile, Tobiume disappeared in a glimmering mist.

"TOBIUME YOU GET BACK-" Hinamori sighed in defeat. She continued thinking about what her spirit had told her.

Her eyes widened. There was only one place left that she could think of.

**UP ON THE BALCONY**

As Hinamori dashed across Sereitei, many pairs of bemused eyes stared down at her from the eighth division balcony.

"Ah, young love." Shunsui-taicho mused as he brought another cup of sake to his lips, Nanao attending to him.

"That stuff just makes me years younger," Ukitake agreed. Many of the other taichos murmured assent.

"So, has Kurotsuchi-taicho recovered at all?" Soi Fon was washing her hands free of blood.

"Currently his lieutenant is doing something extremely complicated to him," Kenpachi said.

"What is that?"

"Weaving fantasies of young, sexy women into his mind." Byakuya shook his head. Things were getting awkward between him and the second division taicho after another new video had shown up.

ARE THEY IN LOVE OR WHAT? (Soi Fon and Byakuya) - 1,000,000,000,233,678,333,998,987,456,000,000,000,000,440,500,777,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,005 views as of two seconds ago.  
"I'm not even going to ask how she's doing it."

**Hitsugaya**

He was so cold. Yes, he knew he had thought of that many, many times, but seriously, it was cold. And with only one tiny threadbare blanket in the whole house, what was he supposed to do?

_Someone come help me...it's so cold I can't stand it anymore..._

**Hinamori**

She crashed through the streets of Junrinan, searching for the house with the peach tree in front. Her old home, the old home that she shared with Hitsugaya and Obaa-san. Hinamori skidded to a stop in front of a decrepit, old hut that was falling apart. It looked nothing like the welcoming home she had when she was younger. Then only thing that looked remotely familiar to her was the old peach tree in front.

It began to snow. Tiny flakes landed all over the ground, coating it with a sheer layer of the purest white. Hinamori slowly walked into the hut, ignoring the icy, chilly cold that was freezing her butt off. She cautiously made her way into the common room.

And saw her childhood friend -and possible crush- lying on the ground, a ragged blanket thrown over him, shivering in his sleep.

Hinamori had to crack a grin. Apparently her friend had never remotely considered looking around the whole place for some blankets or pillows. She reached up to a shelf and pulled down several thick blankets and pillows. Gently she lifted up his head, pulled a pillow underneath, and set it down again. Hinamori also took out a fluffy, unused blanket and spread it over his body.

A feeling of drowsiness came over her. Hinamori had woken up at six; she had gone to bed at about three in the morning. Stifling a yawn, she made a small nest for herself before falling asleep.

**Hitsugaya**

It was warm. Not cold, but actually warm. Hitsugaya opened one teal-colored eye, then the other. Something heavy was cloaking his body, and he saw, in the dim light of the hut, that another thicker blanket had been carefully tucked over him. No wonder he wasn't cold at all. Someone had been there.

His eyes searched around the tiny room, coming to a sudden halt at a mound of blankets. Hinamori was sleeping, her small hands clutching the blanket that she had spread over herself. Her breath came out in shallow gusts of mist.

_So she did know where I was,_ Hitsugaya thought as he slowly climbed out of the blanket. _And she even had the decency to get me a pillow. _His cheeks flared up slightly. _How nice of her_.

For just a few minutes, he just stared at the girl that was his friend. Her raven-colored hair was escaping from the bun that she had hastily put together that morning. A simple tug, and Hinamori's hair escaped from the cloth altogether. He noticed that her hair was long, past her shoulders in a slight curl. Smiling, he reached a rough hand out, and twirled her hair between his fingers. It was as fine as silk, as delicate as a whisper.

He was so engrossed in his old habit that he didn't realize when she had woken up, and was staring at him through large chocolate eyes.

**Hinamori**

The bed...so warm... Hinamori drifted to and fro in the river of sleep, when she felt a tentative hand touch her hair. One chocolate eye peeked open, and her cheeks colored. Hitsugaya was absentmindedly playing with her hair, his fingertips stroking each smooth strand.

"Ah, Shiro-chan..." The fingers stopped, as Hitsugaya's face became a color akin to a ripe red apple. Hinamori smiled as she sat up and stared back at him, before throwing her arms around him in a heart-stopping hug. "I finally found you!"

"Baka bed-wetter, where else would I be?" Hitsugaya mumbled as his face turned warmer and warmer. Had she always been that strong, or was he just getting weaker and weaker in her arms?  
Finally Hinamori let go, and beamed at him. "So what now? Do we go back?" She began folding up her blankets.

"Wait. I wanted to tell you something."  
"Hmm?"

"It's about yesterday." With those words, her heart dropped, her smile wavered, but she kept her ground.

"What about it?"

"Was it true? Or not?" He fought to keep his voice from quivering.

Playfully she stuck her tongue out at him, ignoring the sudden increase in her heartbeat. "Why should I tell you?"

"Just because."

"Because?" She crossed her arms as she sat next to him, wagging a finger in his face. "Not a good enough answer, Shiro-chan!"

Hitsugaya sighed in frustration. He didn't know what to say, or what to do for that matter. Just tell her straight out, or what? An idea popped into his head.

"I've been wondering...about the girl that I like."

Hinamori's heart sank just a tad bit lower. "So what is it? Do I get to know?" She added on a lighter note.

"Possibly," he replied, his eyes not ever leaving her face. "The real question here is, do you have the right to know or not."

"It's your decision, Shiro-chan." Hinamori sighed inwardly. When was she ever going to get the guts and just say it?

"I think it's better if I showed you instead." He ran a hand through her hair, before slowly reaching his hands towards her. Hinamori was frozen as he slowly pulled her to him. She felt her cheeks glowing heatedly as he slowly hugged her.

"Shiro-chan?" It was more of a question now, as she slowly looked up at him in disbelief. "What are you doing?"  
"Showing you, baka." He smiled, a genuine, warm smile etching on his face. "What else would I be doing?"

"Shiro-chan..." Hinamori's voice drifted off as a happy smile graced her face. "I wanted to let you know...what I said yesterday was true."

**Ugh my first attempt at anything remotely fluffy. Please review; you don't know how much that means to me.**

**I am done with my first multiple-shot fic. Thanks for reading!**

**Thanks for reviewing,**

**kitkathappiness**

**bananapower**

**LadyDy**

**and the 2 Guests!**


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